Ash Ambirge's Recent LinkedIn Posts

The more AI annoys the shit out of all of us, the more it becomes blindingly true that we either need to: a) Plan for euthanasia; b) Revolt by writing like THE MOST HUMAN HUMAN EVER. Yes, that's right. The most human human ever. Complete with a wedgie and 2,456 unanswered emails. This is THE MOVE for 2026. Because, brah, AI is going to make you look like a buck-toothed 4th grader at the The New York Metropolitan Museum of Art. Sure, you can "do things" with AI. (Like that article I read about the woman who has full-on made herself an AI husband based on a fantasy novel. 🥴) It can write your newsletter. (I'd rather slice open the back of my heel.) It can write your product descriptions. (If you're operating a laundromat in Binghamton, New York.) It can write your wedding vows. (If you're planning on getting licked by your fianceé's best friend in the bathroom.) But, here's the problem: AI can never be good taste. (That is not a lick joke. But, equally true.) It's like covering your body in "Live, Laugh, Love" signs. AI can turn you into a Home Goods decoration made in China. But, it can never make you an icon. It can never make you well-loved. You know how you can get turned on by some writers? The ones that manage to say things with a crowbar in one hand, and a french kiss in the other? The ones that marry killer instincts with "I wrote this while staring into the sea"; the ones that make you think, and make you brave, and make you long for the kinds of fever dreams you didn't even know were real. These are the ones we will follow to the end of the earth. AI? Please. AI is a joke. It's like going out to play a football match with a maxi pad stuck to your elbows. Instead of that? I'd MUCH rather teach you my all-time favorite creative writing technique that will instantly lift everything up and make anything you're writing feel fresh, original, alive, and interesting...without ever sounding like ChatGPT. 🤢 Emails, newsletters, content, pitches, books (??? 😃), websites, weird letters to your neighbor—ALL FAIR GAME. And, it's easy and immediate to implement: one of those things that "once you see it, you can't unsee it." Grab your lunch (and a beer?) and come take my (free) super fun 30-minute creative writing skills workshop next week! Register free below: 👇 https://lnkd.in/eb8EtbaM

💥 CREATIVE MARKETING COPY 💥 Cards Against Humanity, LLC has literally launched.... ...a ridiculous mayonnaise that tastes like clams.... ...named it "CLAM-O-NAISE" ...and then buried an add-on pack of 30 cards inside the jar. This is literally available at Target. 😂 The funny part is, they aren't trying to get you to buy mayonnaise—they're trying to get you to write posts like this one. And ~that's~ why their marketing is so effective. #creativemarketing #blackfriday

Right as world modernizes and goes #digitalnomad, big companies are making decisions designed for the year 2004. Ex: banks needing you to be physically present to send a wire. 🙄 Companies constantly needing to send text confirmations to your number on file, versus authenticator or email. (So then you have to turn on roaming OR not be able to access.) Or, Derek Earl Baron having his Facebook accounts shut down bc new rules require permanent location. This one's gonna get uggggly ⬇️

Realistically, only two things matter in online business: —An email list —A strong offer How you get there is everything else, i.e. social, podcasts, ads, kissing ass. (And also where most people spend their time, even though they haven't optimized above.☝🏻) #creatoreconomy #creators #onlinebusiness

Prediction for THE THEME of 2023: "The Return to Innocence." (Basically we all want to go live in a cabin & jump Kevin Costner's bones 😀.) This is especially relevant for the #hospitality industry, and how you can cater your marketing to hit a nerve, be relevant, & create fresh campaigns that feel timely. 💥 P.S. This isn't just useful for attracting tourists, but also the new adult #digitalnomad and professional #remoteworker...who have far more time and far greater spending power than their early predecessors.

Just off phone with author who called me because “I’m a really fun person in real life but it’s not reflected in my manuscript—I can’t seem to get it on the page!” Baby, grab my hand. This is what I do BEST. 🕵🏻‍♀️ Can’t wait for you to read! 📖 👏🏻 🎉 #BookPublishing #BookEditor #StyleEdit

My book, THE MIDDLE FINGER PROJECT—about imposter syndrome & work—was shouted out in The New Yorker today. An interesting piece on whether or not imposter syndrome even deserves the title.

Remember when everyone thought newspapers were dead? SURPRISE, they're back! (But in a totally new, cool way.) 🗞️ 🖤 We're seeing a real craving for analog right now. The chic newspaper printing company Newspaper Club is proof: more companies are *printing* their newsletters and turning them into newspapers SO THEY CAN DO SOMETHING FRESH. Before—when everyone thought print was dead—this would have been seen as old-fashioned. Now, it's seen as the coolest thing you can be doing right now. Why? Because to print something means you really care about it. And, we want to do business with the ones who do. #creativemarketing

Pitch for the new Wondercraft is fantastic: "Canva for Audio." More businesses would benefit from learning how to think like investors, journalists, and book publishers, all of which want a snappy pitch like this, so they instantly *get* it (and so do buyers).

Woke up at 4am for this fun interview with The Guardian. Cackling at my new title as "life coach." Can you imagine? "Get your ass to the woods! Buy a weird old house! Write yourself to the bone! And learn how to use a goddamn chainsaw, you overthinking meatloaf!"

Imagine what you’d post on social if you thought of it as an art project, rather than a high-stakes performance????? More on this ➡️: https://lnkd.in/eJX2KBz6

BAD DAY FOR BAD MARKETERS. 👀 Google unrolling new Gmail feature that tells on companies for sending too many emails that nobody wants to read. New "manage subscriptions" tab will tell you exactly how many emails Bath & Body Works has sent you this quarter. This is gonna be fun.

AMAZING way to gracefully *decline* creative work! ⬇️⬇️⬇️ 💥 "If what I think you need is what I see in my mind, then I don't think I'm your person. I'm not made for that, it would be creatively frustrating. Which makes me so, so sad, because I know how great you are to collaborate with, and everything you touch turns to gold!" 💥 Got this gracious note back from my long-term friend and ✨favorite✨ watercolor artist + illustrator, Marta Spendowska (verymarta.com), re: artwork commission for my new British-florals-meets-rap-lyrics wallpaper + interiors company. (Check out my Substack on the process: https://lnkd.in/eZy-56Bx) And actually? *It was a joy to read.* It's SO refreshing when someone knows themselves so well, they can confidently say: "It would be creatively frustrating for me to work on this, because I'm not built for this." Instead, most of us just say 'yes' and then want to walk into the ocean. But, creative integrity is HOT. Because when you know what you ARE built for? You can clear the runway for *that*. " You can be EVERYTHING ~THAT~. And, when you've got that kind of clarity? *So does the world.* It sees you. 👀 And it will sit up and takes ~notice~. *** So, question! Do we know any fine art floral / surface pattern artists?!?!?!? 😃 I'm LOVE LOVE LOOOOOVING the work of Maggie Enterrios so far in my research! Talk about a dream!!!!

I think this makes me a grandmother in internet years

America is funny: things that should be hard are terrifyingly easy, while things that should be easy are, well, terrifyingly hard. For example, you’ve got drive-thru beer stores, drive-thru emergency rooms, drive-thru funeral parlors, drive-thru strip clubs, and drive-thru weddings. And yet, I cannot get a beer at McDonald’s. Did you know you can get a beer at McDonald’s in Germany? And Greece? And Sweden? And Italy? When I lived in Chile, you could get ‘em at any fast food chain…even in mall food courts. (Especially in mall food courts. Just think of all those 12-year-olds in crop tops.) I can also buy an island, a Mercedes, a $40 million Gulfstream private jet, and gaggles of prohibited drugs entirely online, but try to send a wire to your mortgage company, and YOUR BANK IS GONNA BE PISSED. Raise the red flags, there is some real suspicious activity going on here, let’s make ‘em drive three hours to come into a branch. A child with the emotional maturity of a mop can also get a driver’s permit at age sixteen (16), while I, age 39, practically need to pay off a local official in the middle of a field on the third day of the blood moon in the month of February just to get issued a permit to install a new drainage pipe in my driveway. { Finish Reading: https://lnkd.in/ewM2iNet }

You can be human and down-to-earth and edgy and cool without being uncouth.

We want the bold. We want the glorious. We want the person with the hip-swaying attitude, the white-hot opinion that feels just a little too dangerous. We want oceans. And skies. And entire universes inside of the people we follow. We want them to lead us somewhere ~magnificent~. We want them to give us strength, and inspire us to our own grand aspirations—even if they have been placed in a drawer in the very back, behind the old cloth handkerchiefs, for far too long. We want them to touch us with their magic. And, that’s a magic that can only come from an incandescent belief in what you are doing.

The term #digitalnomad has a PR problem. It feels a little bit like putting on Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle PJs from the 4th grade. 🐢 The 30-something millennial grew up, and our earning power grew with it. Today's nomad has money, property, and a retirement plan. Yet, most people hear "digital nomad" and think: "Shot-gulping, sandal-wearing, tattoo-donning backpacker crowd, armed with a Macbook, $2,000, and an actual set of abs." But, hello, (1) Abs are a myth 😅; (2) I haven't traveled this way since my early 20s. However, I'm still a digital nomad. We've become a hybrid social group, falling somewhere in between the freedom and adventurous ambitions of our younger counterparts, and the stability and “I own a fringed fucking lampshade” sensibilities of our more established selves. Most notably, however, this shift in both demographics and earning power of the remote workforce means that cities, towns, places, and the travel industry are going to experience a critical shift, too. There are (at least) 6 I predict. ⬇️ -Hostels to Airbnbs & subscription hotels -Budget destinations to in-demand destinations -Street food to fine dining -Party atmosphere to family -Appreciating the architecture to owning a piece of it -Piranhas on a town to supporting local economy ^^^ This last one is important. Earning power translates into spending power. 💵 That means that the new professional-class digital nomad can now support local businesses in more meaningful ways. Ways that the young twenty-something backpacker never could. That will be a defining characteristic of the new nomad in 2023 & beyond. This shift can finally offer increased financial benefits to local populations, ensuring a more mutually beneficial ecosystem between host community and nomad. And, that might be the best part.

Little research 😉 ⬇️ #emailmarketing #thanskgiving

Heritage travel is the new #digitalnomad trend for 2023. 🔥 Remember when last summer felt like EVERYONE YOU KNEW was in Italy? They were. And, it’s not a coincidence. More #remotework than ever > more families traveling > a massive surge in trips to find your roots this year. (And stroller rage, LOL.) Before, professionals used their 2 weeks to recover from life. Now, they’re realizing they can go LIVE life. I predict this year will be a banner year for trips to not only find yourself, but find your past—wherever that may be. *** P.S. My roots are Ireland and Italy! Where are yours??? (Headed to Italy this summer to discover the teeeeny, tiny little village that is TEORA. 🇮🇹 Thank you @duolingo for helping me smoke my Italian game!)

Writing, when done well, should change the reader. In fact, that’s why any of us bother reading anything at all. No one reads so they can be exactly the same afterward. We want to see the world in a new light.

“We’ve never done this before” - 10/10 readers recommend writing if you never want them to open your email during Black Friday/Cyber Monday. 🤷‍♀️ (You can also say it during new and exciting sexual situations.)

5 copywriting hacks that will change your life forever ⚡️ (seriously) 1. Headline limp? 🍌 Try a ballsy verb. MURDER YOUR THIRST > QUENCH YOUR THIRST. (That’s the actual tagline for Liquid Death water. 😉) 2. Open rates limp? 🍌 Emojis in the subject line have a 56% higher open rate. (No shit.) 3. Copy limp? 🍌 Creep your inbox + pull the words your customers are actually using. I FEEL STUPID MAKING VIDEOS > HIGH BIT-RATE VIDEO EDITING SOFTWARE 4. Conversions limp? 🍌 Give people just ONE thing to do. Take away all of your main navigation, links to your social media accounts, and the link to your two-bedroom Airbnb condo in the Bahamas. (Jerk.) And then give one simple, clear instruction: ✨ BUY NOW ✨ 5. Bio limp? 🍌 Add creepily specific details. “I served as Director of Marketing for eight years, where I made TikToks beats to Beyonce, made sure our website didn’t look like it was from 2012, and wrote the world’s most enticing articles on all the things you never knew you could do with kitty litter. (No, really, do you know what you can do with that stuff?)” > ”I served as Director of Marketing for eight years, where I was responsible for developing promotional campaigns, managing the company website, and producing content that aligned with company objectives.” And, that’s a wrap! Who knew that such tiny little tweaks could change your fate in such big ways? (Just kidding, I don’t believe in fate, I believe in being frigging good.)

Decided I'm going to start ending all of my emails with: "Sending you a Costco-sized vat of whoop ass." Really want to bring that term back.

Props to Ghost for this kick-ass micro copy that made me smile 👏 👏 👏

Prediction 🪄 Creative writing will become one of the most in-demand—and highest-paid—careers, once everybody starts using AI and realizes they sound like a toilet bowl. 🚽 😊

You can read an email that makes you laugh, but not act. You can read a post that makes you think, but not act. Emotional connection is the one thing that can make the world yours. It's the king, queen & the holy priest. And they're having a threesome on your customer's lawn. 🏡 #creativecontent #copywriting

Hustle culture is over. Right now, we basically just want to go frolic in a cabin 🏡 in a faraway land where we can wake up & walk in a meadow with our morning coffee, do a few hours of meaningful creative work, & have a fresh lunch of lemony-ass asparagus. YES, LEMONY-ASS ASPARAGUS. 🌱 After that, we want to spend the rest of the afternoon leisurely refinishing an old bureau in the backyard, listening to French cafe music, and journaling ideas for our new novel in the warmth of the evening sun. Who doesn't want that? The thing is, it used to sound like a pipe dream. But today, it's more possible than ever. This kind of lifestyle simply requires you to learn how to leverage two things: Talent Time If you can learn how to do that well, you can make space for yourself to live again. Because otherwise, when is the LIVING supposed to happen??? After you've shut down your laptop at 10pm? In between Zoom calls with blowhards you don't even like? When you stay on the toilet extra, extra long, just to have a few minutes to yourself guilt-free? (Guilt free: new toilet paper brand???) When are you supposed to actually live? Because working all the time isn't actually living. But, sometimes I wonder if we just don't know what else we're supposed to be doing. Should we be frolicking in meadows? Should we be—gulp—relaxing? Should we be doing LESS? (Eeeeekkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!) Is that a responsible adult thing to do?! Everything besides work feels wrong. At least, that's what modern culture has created—and it's no thanks to Instagram and now TikTok that everyone feels like they've got to ALWAYS be on. There is no off button. There is always another person to respond to; another reel to be posted; another game of circle jerk. Quick, a message! Quick, be responsive! Quick, be engaging! It's such a joke. So much of what we're doing to ourselves right now is a joke. And the worst part is, we started doing it all in the name of "freedom," but I've never seen a more sorry sack of humans than the ones running around on the earth right now. You thought keeping up with the Jones' was hard? Try keeping up now. Someday you will die super pissed off that you spent your entire life worrying about creating 15-second videos that meant nothing to you, instead of creating a body of work that did. F*ck it, let's all buy cabins. In a world that preys on our attention, it might be the last place we have. #futureofwork #digitalnomad #thefutureofworkisthefutureoftravel

Giving a talk to senior creatives at Wilkes University today and was asked to comment on ethical challenges of working in communications. For me, it's about being responsible with the power you have to make bad people look good. 💅🏻 Writers, designers, photographers, podcast editors: all of these jobs take what wasn’t shiny, and makes them so. That’s what we’re trained to do, right? Gloss it up. Make that article sound better. Edit those photos. Create that logo. Clean up that podcast. That's all good—and very necessary!—but it's a superpower that can also be used for evil in the wrong hands. It's easy to make an unqualified sociopath look like gold on the internet. So, will you still do it for the money? ^ That's the question I want them to consider. Have you faced any ethical conundrums in your line of work???? #communications #ethicalmarketing #ethicalbusiness

We make cowardly choices & then wonder why we struggle to market our work; to get anyone on board with us and our cowardly choices. But, people know when you're covering up a lack of passion with false enthusiasm.

A website and some words. That's all you need. You can make your dream project come to life in one night. 🌙 What are we so afraid of?

This is why we need what I call “pro creative writing skills” more than ever. Sanitary, lifeless, over-professionalized “KPI poetry” isn’t doing its job anymore. If the job is to connect, then we can’t use language that automatically makes the brain 🧠 want to *disconnect*. Selling is linguistics. No sale on earth can happen without words. That 47-tab Google Drive folder isn't going to create sales for you. Another freebie doesn't create buying intent. Switching email platforms won’t double your revenue. Upgrading to Kajabi Pro won’t make strangers want you. More certifications won't create more authority. A new tier won’t fix low demand. And changing your niche won’t solve the problem of being unheard. Great f*cking words are the only way. *** Get the newsletter that'll remove your "corporate lanyard voice" and shove it up your boss's desk. 😉 www.deadvoiceclub.com

"You could sell a course on waxing around the varicose vein on your inner thigh and I’d buy it" 👆 Announcing my new biz venture

This girl is a poet—but also a marketing genius. ✅ She could have just written random poems. Instead, she followed a pattern: ➡️ "In English we say..." ➡️ "In poetry we say..." And now she's famous. Lesson: packaging is *everything*.

Been writing a newsletter since 2009. You know the biggest thing that's changed since then? People stopped writing newsletters. And started writing content. Guess which one people actually want to read? #FREAKSTREAKWRITINGCHALLENGE https://lnkd.in/ecCU9iSh

⚔️ STORY vs IDEA ⚔️ Does your writing focus on the story, or focus on the idea? Most people write a story, call it a day, and then go eat a mozzarella stick. 🧀 But the *story* is just a vehicle for the *idea*. Without the idea, nobody cares about your story.

Most brands are boring. 🥱 Delight is underrated. This is a feature explanation from Discourse. They didn't have to surprise users with personality-filled copy, but they chose to, and that's the point.

The good news is, if I ever accidentally send an email broadcast without content, it will feature lyrics from 1994. #emailmarketing

What's the #1 thing you wish you knew when you first entered the #job market????

How you describe your work not only affects how valuable others perceive it as, but how valuable *you* perceive it as. Not being able to talk about your idea = massive source of imposter syndrome. #impostersyndrome #messaging #digitalcreators

Spent morning analyzing #travelwriting articles. 3 things make for a brill piece: 1. Introductions with people as focus vs place description. 2. Relevant angles linking back to current newsworthy themes. 3. Writer's ability to make meaningful, thought-provoking connections. #writer #travelwriter #travelblogger

I'm on the hunt to find the world's most livable places—the kind where you feel happy & proud to live there. 🏡 🗺️ A speaking engagement in Denver led me to realize I was “close” to Iowa—the home of "Iowa nice"—and, what’s a nine-hour ride in a 1.8 liter rental car with weak acceleration and few advanced safety features????? My verdict on Iowa below! ⬇️ ⬇️ ⬇️

Crossing guard makes $14K/month sharing her musings from her job—with a print zine. 🗞️ Called this trend out last week—newspapers are the new newsletters! 🌈

Weird newsletter mistake 🔪 no one (usually?!) realizes is a newsletter mistake: ~ Using the word "I" more than the word "you." ~ If the # of "I's" outnumber the "you's," you're not writing a newsletter, you're writing a diary entry. 💛 Example: https://lnkd.in/emuy5cNa

The most creative, fun instruction manual on *earth*. 📝 High five Schiit Audio! I'm totally going to have to add this as a service to my new creative writing company, coming SOON. I'll have no choice but to call it: "Manual Labor." More here: https://lnkd.in/gP8Uuc4n

I have a bone to pick. IT IS A RATHER LARGE BONE. 🦴 But first, lemme attempt to hoist myself up onto my countertop here—from which I shall sip something with *basil*—and ask you: Which emails do you never. freaking. open? I have a theory (not about basil in your drinks, but also have you ever HAD a basil pisco sour 🌿🍹?!?!?!??!). Here is that theory: The more images, the less opens. Otherwise written very cooly (am I cool still???) as: +images, -opens. Unless you are sending me images of REALLY GREAT WALLPAPER (we know, I have an obsession), I don't really want: Pictures of your President's Day banner Pictures of a grid of your content Pictures that look ANYTHING like stock Pictures pulled directly from your Shopify product page Pictures that feel like ads A collage. I don't care what kind of collage. I will think I am being sold leggings. They cause a hard, emotional delete before they even finish loading. And, you know who is weirdly—weirdly—guilty of this? Like, the last people on earth you'd think would be guilty of this?! Book publishers 📚 & Book sellers 📖 *gasp! I said it!* You ever seen this line 40,000 times in your inbox? “ "Discover your next great read." How is it possible that the people in charge of "discovering your next great read," are all writing emails that are not so great? If your job is “discovering my next great read,” you don’t get to be neutral. You have to pick a side. Even if that side is feral. Which is why I'd like to propose a different idea. Instead of sending out a generic corporate piece of "email marketing" that no one is going to care about, why not hire a team of kick-ass writers who can *actually write emails?* Because do you know what we want from an email? Perspective. Discernment. An opinion. A POV. And, these are not things you can give to us if you're writing as "a corporate entity." Until your corporate entity can sit down with me and have a basil pisco sour? I DON'T WANT YOUR EMAIL, JACK-O. If your email needs images to survive, it’s not an email; it’s a brochure wearing a trench coat. And, in a most ironic twist??? The real reason we still crave books is because there are no ads in them. So, the emails used to sell them damn well shouldn't be. *** Get my (new!) Dead Voice Club newsletter if you want to learn how to write with fresh spunk, personality, and charisma this year (without feeling like a stooge). https://lnkd.in/eYqeT8Tw

Diary writing: What happened Newsletter writing: What changed

There are only 2️⃣ kinds of small towns: the kind you want to leave immediately, and the kind you want to stay in forever. I found the latter! (Hint: it's in Illinois.) BUT—could you handle the politics????????? I write about my experience here. #travelwriting #smalltown #mostlivableplaces

Anybody specialize in filming online courses and has a kick-ass studio? (Will travel! 🧳)